As a kid, I knew that God was real; but as I grew older, I fell in love with the world, chasing after what I wanted, what I saw, and what I believed was good for me.
The foolish path that I chose got darker and darker, and eventually, after years of struggling in addiction, I drove myself to my local hospital and told them I wanted to end my life. I was completely hopeless, and I was completely lost. I felt like a man groping in the dark, looking for a purpose I was sure existed, but only stumbling, and always falling.
My mom dropped a Bible off at the mental hospital I’d been transported to. I didn’t want to read it, but I didn’t want to hurt her feelings, so I took it. I had tried “religion”, tried “church”, tried “Jesus”. I set it on the shelf next to my bed. Over the next few days there, I read everything I could find except that Bible. I talked to psychiatrists. I had joined a cult, and I spoke to my leaders by phone. It was all so empty.
I had been there about a week when I finally picked up that Bible. As I read Colossians 2:6-15, I heard God pleading with me to turn to Him and live. I know that sounds crazy, and I agree, I was in a hospital, but really, I heard His voice through His Word. He told me that the world was cheating me, that He could make my life complete, and that the proof of His love and power was the atoning death, burial and victorious resurrection of His son Jesus. I didn’t have to throw my life away, because He gave His life to give me a NEW LIFE!
Everything changed. I was no longer a slave, but a son, and a son who had been set free! I spent the next few years getting discipled at Calvary Residential Discipleship out of Calvary Chapel Bangor. I met my wife there. We started a family there. I learned a trade there.
That was 15 years ago! I have six kids now. I’ve worked as a baker, a carpenter, a shelf stocker, a corrections officer and a general contractor. He’s stood with me through it all, through everything life has thrown at me, through my own mistakes and failings and wanderings. I’m still amazed at His endless grace, at His good plan for my life, and how trustworthy His Word is.
Just what kind of perfect love is this, that God has so freely given His life for me!?! Whoever thought I would be called a child of God! The world, falsely strong and sophisticated in its love of the dark, they don’t know Him, but He sent His Living Word, Jesus Christ, to save me and rescue me from my own destructions! Thank you LORD!
Psalm 107:17-21 - “Fools, because of their transgression, and because of their iniquities were terribly afflicted. Their soul abhorred all manner of food, and they drew near to the gates of death. Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble and He saved them out of their distresses! He sent His Word and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions. Oh, that men would give thanks to the Lord for His goodness, and for His wonderful works to the children of men!"
